So I was telling one of my daughters about seeing the recently released Fast Nine and she mentioned that she had never seen any of the entries in the Fast and Furious oeuvre. "Where did I fail as a parent, as a father?" I asked myself, and then set about rectifying the problem. This was one of those efforts.
Unfortunately, I discovered two things during the viewing of this and other movies:
1) The Theory of General Fast and Furiousity holds that, at any given time, any Fast and Furious movie is being shown somewhere on the television, either on cable or a streaming service. I found this to be false. My fellow scientists and I will recalibrate our data and investigate further.
2) You can lead a twenty-something daughter to Toretto, but you can't make her watch. Despite the high-octane action, insane stunts and amazing amounts of cheese, my daughter simply wasn't entertained. Maybe if I introduce the drinking game element. My fellow scientists and I will recalibrate our data and investigate further.