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The ADHD Effect on Marriage: Understand and Rebuild Your Relationship in Six Steps Paperback – September 1, 2010

4.6 out of 5 stars 1,019 ratings

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Editorial Reviews

Review

"The ADHD Effect is a brilliant compilation of what you can do if you are in a marriage where one or both of you have ADHD.  It is a life-saver of a book..." --Dr. Edward Hallowell, co-author of Driven to Distraction

"We adore this book!  It's a comprehensive guide to dealing with the impact of ADHD on your marriage without making either partner wrong..." --Kate Kelly and Peggy Ramundo, authors of You Mean I'm Not Lazy, Stupid or Crazy?!

From the Inside Flap

"This book provides an incredibly valuable service to those struggling in a marriage with ADHD.  Written by someone who has been there and knows firsthand how ADHD can disrupt a marriage, it will help couples truly understand ADHD, realize they are not alone, and teach them what specifically can be done to align together as a team to turn things around.  Ms. Orlov has done a wonderful job of providing knowledge, awareness, and hope to those who sorely need it."
     -Kevin Murphy, PhD, co-author of ADHD in Adults: What the Science Says
"The ADHD Effect is an exceptional book that addresses the complexity of the relationship between partners whose lives are affected by ADHD while presenting sound family system principles in an easy-to-understand and accessible way...I would highly recommend this book to my clients, their partners, and to couple therapists who want to learn to effectively guide couples in marriages challenged by The ADHD Effect."
     -Sari Solden, MS, LMFT, author of Journeys Through ADDulthood
"Orlov's work is a beacon of light and hope, offering strategies that help couples feel happier and more satisfied."
     -Ari Tuckman, PsyD, MBA, author of More Attention, Less Deficit

Product details

  • Publisher ‏ : ‎ Specialty Press/A.D.D. Warehouse (September 1, 2010)
  • Language ‏ : ‎ English
  • Paperback ‏ : ‎ 233 pages
  • ISBN-10 ‏ : ‎ 1886941971
  • ISBN-13 ‏ : ‎ 978-1886941977
  • Item Weight ‏ : ‎ 12.6 ounces
  • Dimensions ‏ : ‎ 5.5 x 0.6 x 8.5 inches
  • Customer Reviews:
    4.6 out of 5 stars 1,019 ratings

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About the author

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Melissa Orlov is the founder of ADHDmarriage.com, and the author of two award-winning books on how ADHD impacts adult relationships - The ADHD Effect on Marriage and The Couple's Guide to Thriving with ADHD.

She is considered &quot;...one of the foremost authorities on ADHD and relationships in the world today&quot; says Dr. Edward Hallowell, author of Delivered from Distraction and other seminal books about ADHD. &quot;Her books can change lives for the better, and dramatically so.&quot;

For over 10 years, Melissa has been counseling couples impacted by ADHD and giving tele-seminars shown to move couples away from destructive interactions and into the healthy, loving relationships they desire. She speaks around the world about adult ADHD and relationships, and teaches therapists how to work with these special couples.

Orlov's website and blog has helped well over a million people understand that they are not alone and that they can change their marriages for the better (www.adhdmarriage.com). In addition to the website, Orlov blogs for Psychology Today, wrote the &quot;Your Relationships&quot; column for ADDitude Magazine between 2008-2014, is a contributor to the first therapist manual about how to counsel couples impacted by ADHD (The Distracted Couple), and is a contributing author to Married to Distraction, with Hallowell and his wife, Sue George Hallowell, LICSW.

Ms. Orlov is a cum laude graduate of Harvard College. In her free time she enjoys road biking, summers at Chautauqua Institution, singing and playing the cello (poorly!) She and her husband of 30 years have two children.

Customer reviews

4.6 out of 5 stars
4.6 out of 5
1,019 global ratings

Top reviews from the United States

Reviewed in the United States on May 4, 2017
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Reviewed in the United States on December 1, 2017
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Reviewed in the United States on September 25, 2018
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Reviewed in the United States on November 23, 2020
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4.0 out of 5 stars A solid resource!
By Morgan D. Farr on November 23, 2020
While the title of this book doesn't immediately make one think of marriage, if you are married to a person dealing with untreated ADHD (Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder) this book can be quite a resource.

When Brian and I got married neither of us knew he had ADHD, so we didn't have to tools necessary to adequately deal with the blessings and challenges that come with ADHD. We spent a lot of time and energy battling over things that we didn't realize were neurological, not behavior based. When I found this book it was like a breath of fresh air.

This is the first ADHD marriage book I read that didn't make the spouse responsible for the person with ADHD. The ADHD Effect also does a good job of treating the ADHD person with respect rather than making it seem like they are somehow broken or less-than because they are not nuerotypical. Orlov gives many recommendations for helping to let go of unreasonable expectations and helping your ADHD spouse to feel valued.

A bonus about this book is the fact that a lot of what Orlov said also helped me relate better to my child with ADHD as well!
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11 people found this helpful
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Reviewed in the United States on September 2, 2018
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Top reviews from other countries

emma_regencyromancefan
5.0 out of 5 stars Finally understand
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on May 15, 2021
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8 people found this helpful
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Abigail Fisher
3.0 out of 5 stars Good for not feeling alone; not so much good on practical advice.
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on October 4, 2013
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59 people found this helpful
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becci f.
5.0 out of 5 stars A must read for all couples effected by ADHD
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on April 9, 2019
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5.0 out of 5 stars A must read for all couples effected by ADHD
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on April 9, 2019
This book is incredible!! A true must read for all couples whose relationships are effected by ADHD. I love that the book is not just aimed at the non ADHD spouse. There's so much helpful and insightful knowledge and tips in the book for both partners and so many suggestions and ideas on how you can both improve yourselves and strengthen your relationship.
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2 people found this helpful
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julianjj
5.0 out of 5 stars Highly recommended
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on February 11, 2018
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Karen
5.0 out of 5 stars Absolutely brilliant book.
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on March 6, 2019
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