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Brain-Body Parenting: How to Stop Managing Behavior and Start Raising Joyful, Resilient Kids Kindle Edition
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From a leading child psychologist comes this groundbreaking new understanding of children’s behavior, offering insight and strategies to support both parents and children.
Nominated for Malcolm Gladwell, Susan Cain, Adam Grant, and Daniel H. Pink's Next Big Idea Club
Over her decades as a clinical psychologist, Dr. Mona Delahooke has routinely counseled distraught parents who struggle to manage their children’s challenging, sometimes oppositional behaviors. These families are understandably focused on correcting or improving a child’s lack of compliance, emotional outbursts, tantrums, and other “out of control” behavior. But, as she has shared with these families, a perspective shift is needed. Behavior, no matter how challenging, is not the problem but a symptom; a clue about what is happening in a child’s unique physiologic makeup.
In Brain-Body Parenting, Dr. Delahooke offers a radical new approach to parenting based on her clinical experience as well as the most recent research in neuroscience and child psychology. Instead of a “top-down” approach to behavior that focuses on the thinking brain, she calls for a “bottom-up” approach that considers the essential role of the entire nervous system, which produces children’s feelings and behaviors.
When we begin to understand the biology beneath the behavior, suggests Dr. Delahooke, we give our children the resources they need to grow and thrive—and we give ourselves the gift of a happier, more connected relationship with them. Brain-Body Parenting empowers parents with tools to help their children develop self-regulation skills while also encouraging parental self-care, which is crucial for parents to have the capacity to provide the essential “co-regulation” children need. When parents shift from trying to secure compliance to supporting connection and balance in the body and mind, they unlock a deeper understanding of their child, encouraging calmer behavior, more harmonious family dynamics, and increased resilience.
In Brain-Body Parenting Dr. Delahooke expands on her paradigm shifting-model of treating children with disruptive behaviors. In contrast to prevailing models that dominate parenting manuals and educational arenas, Dr. Delahooke provides a more compassionate approach that addresses the needs of a child's nervous system and offers insightful examples for readers to rethink and restructure their parenting. This book is a game-changer. -- Dr. Stephen Porges, author of The Polyvagal Theory
“Brain-Body Parenting is an essential guide for parents craving a deeper understanding of their child’s needs, as well as their own. Drawing on insight from her decades of experience as a clinician and mother of three, Delahooke shows readers how to be better detectives when interpreting their child’s signals and how to apply attuned, responsive care to specifics like sleep, play, and skill development. This book is a gold mine of advice." -- Janet Lansbury, bestselling author of No Bad Kids and host of Unruffled
"Dr. Mona Delahooke's latest book Brain-Body Parenting is an incredible, much needed gift to the parenting world. In her gentle, wise way she explains how our little children can struggle with learning how to navigate life and relationships. She not only shows the why, she shares so many stories of how parents can support their little ones to grow and thrive. This brilliant book needs to be in every home, early childhood setting and primary school.” -- Maggie Dent, bestselling author of From Boys to Men and host of the Parental As Anything podcast
“In this revolutionary book, Dr. Mona Delahooke shares powerful insights and groundbreaking research for understanding a child's challenging behavior through the lens of neuroscience and polyvagal theory. With clarity, compassion, and easy to apply strategies, she offers parents and professionals a path to move children toward self-regulation, balance and stability. An absolute a must read.” -- Susan Stiffelman, MFT, author of Parenting Without Power Struggles
“In Brain-Body Parenting, Mona Delahooke translates the latest relational neuroscience research into easily readable and actionable support for parents, amplifying the importance of attuned and loving parent-child relationships. I will be recommending this book to every parent who has at times struggled with their child’s out of control behavior, or their own—which is everyone!” -- Dr. Laura Markham, author of Peaceful Parent, Happy Kids and founder of Aha! Parenting
“This book offers a radically effective approach to parenting that will turn everything you think you know upside-down. Firmly rooted in science but also practical and insightful, Brain-Body Parenting provides an easy-to-follow pathway for parents to help their children thrive without losing themselves in the process.” -- Kristin Neff, PhD, Author of Self-Compassion and Fierce Self-Compassion
“Mona Delahooke speaks to parents like no other as she responds to their concerns and questions with understanding and insight. Her ability to translate and integrate neuroscience with body signaling and a child's emotional experience unravels the mystery of behaviors, offering an exquisite integration of mind, body, and heart. Dr. Delahooke’s knowledge of behavior and development is a moving force that will continue to enhance all we do as parents and clinicians” -- Serena Wieder, Ph.D., clinical director of Profectum Foundation and co-creator of the DIR model
“In Brain-Body Parenting, Mona Delahooke shares extensive knowledge about how children feel, think and act, using a remarkably astute lens to reveal how and why the nervous system affects children’s behaviors and attitudes. With thought-provoking examples and scientific underpinnings, Delahooke provides myriad strategies for fortifying parent-child relationships with love, compassion, and understanding. This book is destined to become a ground-breaking classic!” -- Joanne Foster, Ed.D., gifted education specialist and author of ABCs of Raising Smarter Kids
"A fascinating and practical look at how neurobiology can be applied to parenting challenges." -- Julia Reffner, Library Journal --This text refers to the hardcover edition.
About the Author
Mona Delahooke, PHD. is a licensed clinical psychologist with more than thirty years of experience caring for children and their families. She is a senior faculty member of the Profectum Foundation and a member of the American Psychological Association. She is the author of Beyond Behaviors: Using Brain Science and Compassion to Understand and Solve Children’s Behavioral Challenges, and is a frequent speaker, trainer, and consultant to parents, organizations, schools, and public agencies. She lives and works in the Los Angeles area.--This text refers to the hardcover edition.
- ASIN : B09791SRQV
- Publisher : Harper Wave (March 15, 2022)
- Publication date : March 15, 2022
- Language : English
- File size : 3752 KB
- Text-to-Speech : Enabled
- Screen Reader : Supported
- Enhanced typesetting : Enabled
- X-Ray : Enabled
- Word Wise : Enabled
- Print length : 352 pages
- Page numbers source ISBN : 0063061317
- Lending : Not Enabled
- Best Sellers Rank: #60,751 in Kindle Store (See Top 100 in Kindle Store)
- Customer Reviews:
About the author
Reviewed in the United States on April 19, 2022
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Dr. Delahooke brings into focus practical ideas based on theory and clinical and life experience that can have profound impacts and outcomes in parent-child relating and in building child resiliency.
At a time in history of excessive stress and hardship, what better time than now to focus on what really matters: informed, authentic and attuned responses to our children. This book is a paradigm shifting resource for parenting and working with children. I highly recommend it!
Informed by the latest in developmental neuroscience, the author provides a refreshingly accessible and much-needed parent “roadmap.” It begins with a “whole child” approach. The reader/parent is encouraged to start by observing, understanding, and appreciating the highly individualized body-brain connection that may be influencing your child’s actions/reactions and interactions, especially when their system is under stress.
Through various real-life scenarios, Delahooke provides great examples that illustrate and guide parents towards discovering new tools individualized to their child (and them/us!). Incorporating safe, relationship-based strategies, parent and child problem-solve together, to address and shape “difficult” behaviors. BRAIN-BODY PARENTING offers a unique “inside-out” approach to help your child develop self-control and emotional flexibility, while deepening your connection to your child. A rich and enlightening resource for all parents!
This is the parenting book that needs to be on everyone’s shelves and supports parents on the parenting path from birth through the school years of development.
But what is different than other books is this book is based on the most current research of the brain , neuroscience of development, trauma informed and most importantly is compassionate for parents who may have children that have nervous systems and needs that may present as “challenging”. It is all about relational safety and understanding the nervous system in both our kids AND ourselves.
One of my favorite take always is the concept she calls “body budget”……so important for us to monitor in ourselves and our children. Also understanding one’s own platform and how it can impact our kids, esp if we are not aware of some of our own “past experiences” and how we have carried them with us.
The brain and body need to both be addressed to understand our children in a holistic manner.
Thank you Dr. Mona Delahooke for supporting our families and providing the information that actually helps bring more joy to our lives!
The game changer, for me, is the why they have them in the first place. It's not hard for me to figure out what my child needs (a sense of safety, for example) but why that might be happening, and validation for my guesses is the piece I have been missing. I feel even more confident in responding the way I want to.
Biggest takeaway - viewing outbursts or difficult-to-receive behavior as a gift of information into what's going on with my kiddo.
So worth reading. The first half of the book, I could have highlighted over 50% of it.
Reviewed in the United States on April 19, 2022