"My husband tells our friends that the reason we didn't move back to New Jersey after I saw my first Arizona scorpion is because I was afraid to open the suitcases. I had convinced myself that several generations of scorpions had checked in but had not checked out of the Samsonite. The truth is, I was afraid to get down from the couch. When my husband followed the sound of my screams, he threw a book on top of the scorpion and smashed it back to wherever scorpions go when they die. Then he made fun of me as he compared my size to the flattened arachnid."

That paragraph is from "How to Kill a Scorpion" which is my recent submission to the annual Robert Benchley Award for Humor. I didn't win. I was a semi-finalist. I think not winning had something to do with a rumor that was going around that said I was going to bring sample live scorpions with me to the annual Robert Benchley Society formal banquet - for demonstration purposes. In actuality, it wasn't a rumor. I really WAS going to bring live scorpions with me if I won - in jars with tiny holes in the top, of course - scorpions don't like leashes - so citified people who don't have an opportunity to travel to the Sonoran Desert where they might see real live scorpions could see them up close and personal. I had no intention of demonstrating how to kill them. I don't squish bugs. I just stand on the couch and scream "SCORPION!" and wait to be rescued.

I used to be one of those citified people until I moved to Arizona over twenty years ago. I was tricked into moving to the desert, however. We had found roaches in our high-rise apartment in New Jersey - thousands of roaches - thousands of pregnant roaches. All of our neighbors also had roaches. Short of putting an enormous plastic bag over the 32-story building and bombing it with an insecticide that was both environmentally correct AND one the roaches hadn't built up an immunity toward, we couldn't fight it. My husband then suggested moving to the desert. He was so enthusiastic! "Bugs can't survive the Arizona heat!" he assured me. And I believed him.

What I didn't realize was that not only can bugs survive the Arizona heat, but they grow to Grand Canyon-sized proportions, too.

Beth Cato hails from Hanford, California, but currently writes and bakes cookies in a lair west of Phoenix, Arizona. She’s the Nebula Award-nominated author of the Clockwork Dagger duology and the Blood of Earth trilogy from Harper Voyager. Her short stories and poetry can be found in hundreds of publications, including Fantasy Magazine, Escape Pod, Uncanny Magazine, and The Magazine of Fantasy & Science Fiction.

Beth shares her household with her husband, son, and two feline overlords. Her website BethCato.com includes not only a vast bibliography, but a treasure trove of recipes for delectable goodies. Find her on Twitter as @BethCato and Instagram as @catocatsandcheese.

Susan Harris is a television host, speaker, author, and a teacher of 12 years. Since age nine, she has been standing in front of audiences, and over three decades has inspired thousands in schools, churches, conferences and youth groups to find fulfillment in life. Her beliefs and experiences have helped women in particular to discover practical ways of leading positive and intentional lives. Her messages of hope are presented with clarity, conviction and humour.

Susan obtained her Bachelor of Science in Management Studies from the University of the West Indies and then completed a post graduate Diploma in Education. She went on to earn a Certificate in Biblical Theology from the West Indies School of Theology, a Diploma in Writing from the Institute of Literature in Connecticut, and a Certificate in Human Resources and Industrial Relations from Athabasca University. As a professional, Susan held the designation of Certified Human Resources Professional (CHRP) in Canada from 2008-2014, and is currently a member of the Saskatchewan Association of Human Resources Professionals. She holds membership in Saskatchewan Writers Guild, SaskBooks Publishers, and The Word Guild in Ontario. She volunteers on the boards of the City of Melville and SaskBook Publishers.

Susan holds a Professional A Certificate (teaching), and has worked in human resources and management in secular jobs. She held leadership positions in several churches, and co-pastored with her husband for 19 years. Susan is a member of AWSA (Advanced Writers and Speakers Association) in the US, and is on the speakers’ list for RSVP Canada.

Susan is a hybrid author of 14 books, and has been published by Borealis Press in both English and French. Her writing can be found in several publications including Chicken Soup for the Soul (which features her cat Sir Smokey), and the Sage and Testimony magazines of the Pentecostal of the Assemblies of Canada.

Susan can adapt to audiences and geographic conditions, and she attributes this to the exposure of city living, island living, and rural living. Winter seasons have seen her interchange a briefcase and a shovel, tossing snow in high heeled boots and executive suit. No matter the wear or the place, kindness and compassion are displayed in her life. Prayer is the cornerstone of her life, and she would advise that you cannot cut corners with prayer.

Born and raised in the sparkling island of Trinidad, Susan now makes her home with her family, and Sir Smokey and the rest of the gregarious cat, on the lush prairies of eastern Saskatchewan where she hosts Eternityon Access7 television. www.susanharris.ca

After years of managing projects, developing software, and occasionally writing user manuals as both an employee and an independent consultant, I decided to get creative in a different way and have now won awards for both nonfiction and short fiction. We'll see what happens with my historical novel, currently a work in progress.

While cruising and telecommuting on my sailboat for six years, I transitioned into a writer of nonfiction articles about interesting places, events, and people. Now a landlubber and kayaker in North Carolina, I also write short fiction and essays on the writing life. Other spare time activities include reading (of course!), horsebackriding, and taking long walks.

I’m a member of the Alliance for Independent Authors, the North Carolina Writers Network, and Carteret Writers.

Amy Newmark is Chicken Soup for the Soul’s author, editor-in-chief, and publisher, after a 30-year career as a writer, speaker, financial analyst, and business executive in the worlds of finance and telecommunications. Amy is a magna cum laude graduate of Harvard College, where she majored in Portuguese, minored in French, and traveled extensively. She and her husband have four grown children and grandchildren.

After a long career writing books on telecommunications, voluminous financial reports, business plans, and corporate press releases, Chicken Soup for the Soul is a breath of fresh air for Amy. She has fallen in love with Chicken Soup for the Soul and its life-changing books, and really enjoys putting these books together for Chicken Soup’s wonderful readers. She has co-authored and/or edited the last 170 Chicken Soup for the Soul titles, all the ones published since mid-2008.

You can reach Amy with any questions or comments through webmaster@chickensoupforthesoul.com and you can follow her on Twitter @amynewmark.

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Liane Kupferberg Carter is a nationally known writer, journalist and advocate for the autism community. Her work has been published in the New York Times, Washington Post, New York Magazine, Market Watch, Chicago Tribune, Next Avenue, Longreads, and numerous literary journals, blogs and book anthologies. For more information, visit www.lianekcarter.com

"KETCHUP IS MY FAVORITE VEGETABLE: A Family Grows Up With Autism" is a

*2017 American Society of Journalists and Authors Outstanding Book*

*2017 Foreword INDIES Book of the Year Awards Finalist*

I'm a pixie...a perky, playful pixie. What defines a pixie? Someone who loves all creatures with a maximum of four legs, enjoys a good giggle (especially at one's self), and has a tender heart for the lovable and the loathsome alike. And we have a tendency to write inspirational romance.

My grandmother encouraged me to be a writer. She wrote short stories and poetry, which were published in Philadelphia in the early 1900s. Of course, I ignored her prodding until I grew up and began a life outside my parents' protective umbrella. As a born-again believer in my "late middle earlies," ideas for stories and novels burst forth like popcorn in the microwave. I hope Grandmother is smiling from heaven at my literary successes.

I belong to a network of writing professionals, which includes the Florida Writers Association and Christian Writers Guild/Word Weavers. Both have critique groups, which use the sandwich method (be nice/tell the truth/be nice) to help each other grow as published writers. CWG/Word Weavers recently appointed me President of the Tampa Chapter.

My dedication to writing survives a full-time job, constant home improvements, and my furry feline "children;" all useful distractions to inspire my stories and novels. They offer new sparks to light my creative torch. May it continue to burn brightly for the Lord!