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About Shahida Arabi
Shahida Arabi is a graduate of Columbia University graduate school and is the author of three #1 Amazon Bestsellers. Her bestselling books include The Smart Girl's Guide to Self-Care, a #1 Bestseller in Women's Personal Growth and Becoming the Narcissist's Nightmare, which was featured as a #1 Amazon bestseller in three different categories and has been a #1 Amazon Bestseller in Personality Disorders for 16 consecutive months after its release. Her new book, POWER: Surviving and Thriving After Narcissistic Abuse, was also featured as a #1 Amazon Bestseller in Applied Psychology.
Her writing has been featured on Salon, Psychology Today, Bustle, Inc., VICE, The Huffington Post, Psych Central, The National Domestic Violence Hotline, MOGUL, The Meadows, Dollhouse Magazine, The West 4th Street Review, Thought Catalog, The Good Men Project, YourTango, and Harvard-trained psychologist Dr. Monica O'Neal's website.
Her interests include psychology, sociology, education, gender studies, and mental health advocacy. She studied English Literature and Psychology as an undergraduate student at NYU, where she graduated summa cum laude and was President of its National Organization for Women (NOW) chapter. Her viral articles, "Five Powerful Ways Abusive Narcissists Get Inside Your Head," and "20 Diversion Tactics Highly Manipulative Narcissists, Sociopaths and Psychopaths Use to Silence You" have been shared worldwide and her work has been endorsed and shared by numerous clinical psychologists, mental health practitioners, bestselling authors, and award-winning bloggers.
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In this book, survivors will learn:
•The red flags of narcissistic behavior and covert manipulation tactics, including subtle signs many survivors don't catch in the early stages of dating a narcissist.
•The motives behind narcissistic abuse and techniques to resist a narcissist's manipulation.
•Why abuse survivors usually stay with a narcissist long after incidents of abuse occur.
•How our own brain chemistry locks us into an addiction with a narcissistic or toxic partner, creating cravings for the constant chaos of the abuse cycle.
•Traditional and alternative methods to begin to detach and heal from the addiction to the narcissist, including eleven important steps all survivors must take on the road to healing.
•Methods to rewrite the narratives that abusers have written for us so we can begin to reconnect with our authentic selves and purpose.
•How to rebuild an even more victorious and empowering life after abuse.
Narcissistic partners employ numerous stealthy tactics to devalue and manipulate their victims behind closed doors. These partners lack empathy and demonstrate an incredible sense of entitlement and sense of superiority which drives their exploitative behavior in interpersonal relationships. Their tactics can include verbal abuse and emotional invalidation, stonewalling, projection, taking control of every aspect of the victim’s life, gaslighting and triangulation. Due to the narcissistic partner’s “false self,” the charismatic mask he or she projects to society, the victim often feels isolated in this type of abuse and is unlikely to have his or her experiences validated by friends, family and society.
Using the latest scientific research as well as thousands of survivor accounts, this book will explore how the emotional manipulation tactics of narcissistic and antisocial partners affect those around them, particularly with regards to its cumulative socioemotional and psychological effects on the victim. It will also address questions such as: What successful techniques, tools and healing modalities (both traditional and alternative) are available to survivors who have been ridiculed, manipulated, verbally abused and subject to psychological warfare? What can survivors do to better engage in self-love and self-care? How can they forge the path to healthier relationships, especially if they've been a victim of narcissistic abuse by multiple people or raised by a narcissist? Most importantly, how can they use their experiences of narcissistic abuse to empower themselves towards personal development? What can their interactions with a narcissistic abuser teach them about themselves,their relationship patterns and the wounds that still need to be healed in order to move forward into the happy relationships and victorious lives they do dese
Pathological mind games. Covert and overt put-downs. Triangulation. Gaslighting. Projection. These are the manipulative tactics survivors of malignant narcissists are unfortunately all too familiar with. As victims of silent crimes where the perpetrators are rarely held accountable, survivors of narcissistic abuse have lived in a war zone of epic proportions, enduring an abuse cycle of love-bombing and devaluation—psychological violence on steroids.
From how to heal our addiction to the narcissist to how to recognize a covert narcissist, Shahida Arabi's articles on narcissistic abuse have gained renown as some of the most accurate and in-depth depictions of this terrifying trauma, resonating with millions of survivors all over the world and receiving endorsements from numerous mental health professionals.
In this essay compilation, readers can enjoy some of her most popular articles as well as new thought pieces on narcissistic abuse: what therapists have to say about malignant narcissists and how children of narcissistic parents can become trapped in the trauma repetition cycle. Survivors are offered new insights on what it means to be both a survivor and a thriver of covert manipulation and trauma.
POWER teaches us that it is important to not only understand the tactics of toxic personalities but also to recognize and combat the effects of narcissistic abuse; it guides the survivor to learning, growing, healing and most importantly of all—owning their agency to rebuild their lives and transform their powerlessness into victory.
Although this book is intended for everyone, its target audience is young women who are socialized to believe that their needs and wants don't matter and that their relationships with others are much more important than the relationship they have with themselves. In order to have healthy, happy relationships with others, we must first cultivate healthy, happy relationships with ourselves and eradicate the toxic habits that deplete us of the self-love and self-acceptance necessary for a fulfilling life. You may be wondering: How is it possible to banish the browbeating bully inside your own head, influenced by all the bullies you've encountered in real life? How do you learn how to be more present in the moment rather than ruminating over the pitfalls of your past? How do you learn to love yourself, despite all of the experiences that tell you you aren't even worthy of your own respect and appreciation? Using a patchwork of diverse techniques and practices, The Smart Girl's Guide to Self-Care answers these questions through a holistic program of tending to the mind, body and spirit in healthier and more productive ways, serving as the portal to immense healing and enabling you to stage your own recovery and victory in ways you never thought possible.
What mental health professionals are saying about this article:
"Brilliant article on trauma bonds and recovering from narcissistic abuse." - Andrea Schneider, LCSW, MSW.
"A must read! Perfect article to help you understand the biochemical changes in abuse." - Shannon Thomas, LCSW, Southlake Christian Counseling