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Spermjackers From Hell Kindle Edition
I have some friends and we had a crazy idea: let’s summon a demon. Not just any demon but a sexy devil chick that will do anything we want—even butt stuff. It’ll be easy. It’s not like it’s going to work. Monsters aren’t real.
We were wrong. Really fucking wrong.
The demon is not what we thought and it’s making horrible things happen. People are cutting into each other's junk, some guy is fucking his dog, and sex slugs from Hell are raping us and stealing our semen in order to build a goddamn hive!
We didn’t mean for any of this. But we’re gonna fix it... Just after a few more beers and bong hits.
From Christine Morgan, author of Mythic Lust: the Minotaur, and The Raven’s Table: Viking Stories, comes a sleazy and deviant satire about sex, occultism, and nerd culture.
- ASIN : B074TZGTT3
- Publication date : August 14, 2017
- Language : English
- File size : 692 KB
- Simultaneous device usage : Unlimited
- Text-to-Speech : Enabled
- Screen Reader : Supported
- Enhanced typesetting : Enabled
- X-Ray : Not Enabled
- Word Wise : Not Enabled
- Print length : 247 pages
- Lending : Enabled
- Best Sellers Rank: #590,131 in Kindle Store (See Top 100 in Kindle Store)
- Customer Reviews:
About the author
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Top reviews from the United States
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What you have here is 80’s camp film meets Manga succubus fantasy with a dash of 90’s girl-power-boys-are-dumb thrown in…and it results in a truly unique, entertaining novel.
I really like Morgan’s style of narration. It’s almost like she has a language all her own that reaches out from somewhere sick and twisted, but with a great sense of humor, and an excellent knack for storytelling. What you think is going to happen isn’t what happens, and sometimes, you’re asking, “What the hell just happened?”
Spermjackers wastes no time beating up on boys (particularly video-gaming nerds who can’t get laid), with the males of the tale being sex-crazed idiots who have no clue about women. Which makes perfect sense for the story because what kind of guys would want to summon a sex demon? Maybe video-gaming nerds who can’t get laid? From one bumbling incident to the next, these morons unleash a dark scourge on the town that threatens to destroy every male from one end to the other. Good going, guys.
But, this onslaught against masculinity isn’t done in a malicious fashion (at least maybe not too much), but with a playful air, because, like I said, what kind of guys would want to summon a succubus? But, going further, it isn’t as if the women in town are much better: the young girl who would rather date a loser that treats her bad instead of the nice guy who’s always there for her; the unfaithful wife who doesn’t appreciate her kind, hardworking husband; and the best friend who doesn’t mind rolling her eyes at her dweeby cohorts but goes along with them every step of the way. With ladies like this, maybe we can see why these guys are summoning a succubus!
Basically, Morgan has created an entire cast of interesting characters plunged into fantastic circumstances, and it seems to set the stage for even more shenanigans in the future. But, all fun and supernatural absurdity aside, this book does get very dark in parts. I love the subterranean setting beneath the city where the ritual and climax take place. Towards the end, the book really takes on a strong Clive Barker atmosphere, even seeming to be influenced by some of his work (his short story, “The Madonna,” really comes to mind, and even bits of his novel, The Damnation Game). It’s not for the squeamish, but if you read it with an open-mind, I’m sure you will enjoy it.
I definitely recommend this book to anyone with a love of fun horror, a bit of the sensational and extreme, and a sense of humor. Morgan is an excellent writer. I am really glad I read this one.
A group of horndog pervy pals decide it would be fun to summon a succubus, believing that they'll get a hot naked demon chick with cute little bat wings. How wrong they were...
My favorite thing about this book is that it's one hell of an original twist on the Succubus trope. I love originality and this angle is so well done, so completely horrific and vile and just amazing that it has earned a place among my favorite books.
While this book is not really gory, there is no shortage of bodily fluids. It's gross. It's hilarious. There are these brilliant author interludes that add so much to the story... I couldn't put it down.
If you like Ed Lee. If you like laughing while feeling slightly queasy, if you like new takes on old tropes, this book is definitely for you!
Before we get into the story, I have to talk about the storytelling for a moment. This is a clever, self-aware, disjointed sort of narrative that begins near the end, before rewinding back to the start, with frequent vignettes where Morgan breaks the fourth wall and talks directly to the reader. On the positive side, the style creates some artificial tension, and serves to keep you on your toes, never knowing what's coming next. On the negative side, those vignettes feel like unfulfilled promises, teasing us with unholy erotic retributions that ultimately happen off the page, only to be recapped in passing. There's almost an entire second book waiting in those vignettes.
Okay, so back to the story. This starts out with your basic horror movie premise - a gang of slackers decide to summon a succubus, and plan to do it from within the bowels of the abandoned bomb shelter in the park. It's a great scenario and a great setting, and Morgan gleefully indulges in their squeamish excitement. Nobody, of course, really expects it to work, and even after their frantic flight from the scene, they still manage to convince themselves it was an elaborate prank played by their missing friend. There is a lot of tension between friends, both before and after, and the way Morgan plays on their anxieties is spot-on.
As for the succubus - after all, you did come for the Spermjackers From Hell (pun gleefully intended!) - she's a surprise I am hesitant about spoiling. In terms of physical appearance, she is nothing like what you expect, but in terms of erotic performance, she's everything you dreamed of . . . and had nightmares about. She preys on the darkest fantasies and fetishes of the town as much as she does their most innocent lusts and longings, giving them exactly what they think they crave most. Again, no spoilers, but when we finally get a glimpse of her lair . . . it is total nightmare fetish fuel, a horrifying fate that, despite its grotesque elements, still has a touch of forbidden attraction.
The final twist at the end was perfect, and I am almost embarrassed to say I didn't see it coming. With the door left open for a sequel, I would definitely be up for a second summoning, especially if it can deliver on some of those vignette teases.
Top reviews from other countries
Instead I got an adeptly woven story full of interesting, well drawn characters, with bonus sex and violence. Loved it.
This is subjective but I HATE breaking the fourth wall outbreaks, or at least I certainly did here.
There are parts and nerdy characters I kind of enjoyed, but this just made me feel all the more ripped off and angry, because I kept trudging on.
The anti men, feminist overtones, and the disappointment in this left me as happy a customer as a guy who paid for a lap dance and instead got a lecture on patriarchy, or far closer to this experience for me, finding out the girl you’ve enjoyed talking to was just grooming you for some kind of scam.
I don’t like bagging out new author’s or writing negative reviews to start with, I wanted to like it. Disappointing