A practical guide to better communication that will break the blackmail cycle for good, by one of the nation's leading therapists, Susan Forward.

"If you really loved me..."

"After all I've done for you..."

"How can you be so selfish..."

Do any of the above sound familiar? They're all examples of emotional blackmail, a powerful form of manipulation in which people close to us threaten to punish us for not doing what they want. Emotional blackmailers know how much we value our relationships with them. They know our vulnerabilities and our deepest secrets. They are our mothers, our partners, our bosses and coworkers, our friends and our lovers. And no matter how much they care about us, they use this intimate knowledge to give themselves the payoff they want: our compliance.

Susan Forward knows what pushes our hot buttons. Just as John Gray illuminates the communications gap between the sexes in Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus, and Harriet Lerner describes an intricate dynamic in The Dance of Anger, so Susan Forward presents the anatomy of a relationship damaged by manipulation, and gives readers an arsenal of tools to fight back.

With Mothers Who Can't Love: A Healing Guide for Daughters, Susan Forward, Ph.D., author of the smash #1 bestseller Toxic Parents, offers a powerful look at the devastating impact unloving mothers have on their daughters—and provides clear, effective techniques for overcoming that painful legacy.

In more than 35 years as a therapist, Forward has worked with large numbers of women struggling to escape the emotional damage inflicted by the women who raised them. Subjected to years of criticism, competition, role-reversal, smothering control, emotional neglect and abuse, these women are plagued by anxiety and depression, relationship problems, lack of confidence, and difficulties with trust. They doubt their worth, and even their ability to love.

Forward examines the Narcissistic Mother, the Competitive Mother, the Overly Enmeshed mother, the Control Freak, Mothers who need Mothering, and mothers who abuse or fail to protect their daughters from abuse. 

Filled with compelling case histories, Mothers Who Can’t Love outlines the self-help techniques Forward has developed to transform the lives of her clients, showing women how to overcome the pain of childhood and how to act in their own best interests. 

Warm and compassionate, Mothers Who Can’t Love offers daughters the emotional support and tools they need to heal themselves and rebuild their confidence and self-respect.

From Susan Forward, Ph.D., the New York Times bestselling author of Toxic Parents and Men Who Hate Women and the Women Who Love Them, comes a practical and powerful book that will help couples cope with terrible and toxic in-laws.

Toxic in-laws are in-laws who create genuine chaos through various assaults—aggressive or subtle—on you and your marriage. Toxic in-laws come in a wide variety of guises: “The Critics,” who tell you what you're doing wrong; “The Controllers,” who try to run you and your partner's life; “The Engulfers,” who make incessant demands on your time; “The Masters of Chaos,” who drain you and your partner with their problems; and “The Rejecters,” who let you know they don't want you as part of their family.

Susan Forward draws on real-life voices and stories of both women and men struggling to free themselves from the frustrating, hurtful, and infuriating relationships with their toxic in-laws. Dr. Forward offers highly effective communication and behavioral techniques for getting through to partners who won't or can't stand up to their parents. Next, she lays out accessible and practical ways to reclaim your marriage from your in-laws. She shows you what to say, what to do, and what limits to set. If you follow these strategies, you may not turn toxic in-laws into the in-laws of your dreams, but you will find some peace in your relationship with them.

Susan Forward will helfen, diesen Teufelskreis zu durchbrechen. Anhand zahlreicher Beispiele aus ihrer Praxis erklärt sie im vorliegenden Buch zunächst detailliert und einfühlsam die subtilen Mechanismen, die zwischen Eltern und mißhandelten Kindern wirken. Anschließend erläutert sie Schritt für Schritt, wie Erwachsene endlich den düsteren Schatten ihrer Vergangenheit entkommen können.