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![Twenty-Eight and a Half Wishes (Rose Gardner Mystery, Book 1) by [Denise Grover Swank]](https://m.media-amazon.com/images/I/51dWZ4NQnkL._SY346_.jpg)
Twenty-Eight and a Half Wishes (Rose Gardner Mystery, Book 1) Kindle Edition
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It all started when I saw myself dead.
For Rose Gardner, working at the DMV on a Friday afternoon is bad even before she sees a vision of herself dead. She’s had plenty of visions, usually boring ones like someone’s toilet’s overflowed, but she’s never seen one of herself before. When her overbearing momma winds up murdered on her sofa instead, two things are certain: There isn't enough hydrogen peroxide in the state of Arkansas to get that stain out, and Rose is the prime suspect.
Rose realizes she’s wasted twenty-four years of living and makes a list on the back of a Wal-Mart receipt: twenty-eight things she wants to accomplish before her vision comes true. She’s well on her way with the help of her next-door neighbor Joe, who has no trouble teaching Rose the rules of drinking, but won’t help with number fifteen-- do more with a man. Joe’s new to town, but it doesn’t take a vision for Rose to realize he’s got plenty of secrets of his own.
Somebody thinks Rose has something they want and they’ll do anything to get it. Her house is broken into, someone else she knows is murdered, and suddenly, dying a virgin in the Fenton County jail isn’t her biggest worry after all.
- LanguageEnglish
- Publication dateDecember 19, 2013
- File size1829 KB
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Editorial Reviews
About the Author
From the Inside Flap
The first in the New York Times and USA Today bestselling series.
For Rose Gardner, working at the DMV is bad even before she has a vision of herself dead. She’s had plenty of visions, but she's never seen herself before. When her overbearing momma winds up murdered instead of Rose, there’s only one thing that’s certain: Rose is the prime suspect.
With prison looming, Rose realizes she’s wasted her life and makes a list on the back of a Wal-Mart receipt: twenty-eight things she wants to accomplish before everything falls apart. From getting cable TV to doing more” with a man, Rose is well on her way to committing a good number of the seven deadly sins, with the help of her hot and mysterious neighbor Joe, who has plenty of dangerous secrets of his own.
When her house is broken into and someone else she knows is murdered, Rose realizes that dying in the county jail may not be her biggest worry after all in Denise Grover Swank’s New York Times bestselling mystery debut.
*While supplies last
|Praise for the New York Times and USA Today bestselling series:
"Readers will root for the appealing heroine."
--Publishers Weekly
"Light, fluffy, southern fun."
--Booklist
"TWENTY-EIGHT AND A HALF WISHES is a nice mix of darker elements with some lightheartedness as balance...the light tone and smooth prose keep the story moving."
--Noir Journal
"This was one of those books that I kept telling myself one more page, then I need to put it down. Instead I found myself tearing through the book instead, needing to know the outcome."
--Just Jump Book Reviews on Twenty-Eight and a Half Wishes
"Readers will enjoy this lighthearted romantic suspense novel with a dash of comedy. The characters are memorable, the pace is fast and the dialogue is witty."
--RT Book Reviews on Twenty-Nine and a Half Reasons --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.
Review
"Readers will root for the appealing heroine."
--Publishers Weekly
"Light, fluffy, southern fun."
--Booklist
"TWENTY-EIGHT AND A HALF WISHES is a nice mix of darker elements with some lightheartedness as balance...the light tone and smooth prose keep the story moving."
--Noir Journal
"This was one of those books that I kept telling myself one more page, then I need to put it down. Instead I found myself tearing through the book instead, needing to know the outcome."
--Just Jump Book Reviews on Twenty-Eight and a Half Wishes
"Readers will enjoy this lighthearted romantic suspense novel with a dash of comedy. The characters are memorable, the pace is fast and the dialogue is witty."
--RT Book Reviews on Twenty-Nine and a Half Reasons --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.
Excerpt. © Reprinted by permission. All rights reserved.
It all started when I saw myself dead.
Rain hung heavy in the air that Friday afternoon. The air conditioning of the old municipal building didn’t know how to handle it, making the office especially chilly. I’d just returned from lunch and grabbed my worn red sweater out of my drawer as I sat down at my workstation. The fluorescent lights flickered overhead, casting a sick gray pallor over the room.
I sucked in a breath to prepare myself for the next few hours. All that rain was bound to ruin a lot of Memorial Day Weekend plans, making the DMV customers even crabbier than their usual.
Number fifty-three,” I called out over the counter as I turned on my computer screen.
A scruffy man in his mid-thirties approached and plopped his paperwork on the chest-high counter in a huff.
I need to renew my plates,” he said. Irritation made his voice scratchy.
I looked him over as I tugged the paperwork down. Gray-tinged stubble covered his face, a sharp contrast to his shaggy dark brown hair. His light brown eyes held a menacing glare. I chided myself for my foolishness. Everyone has menacing eyes at the DMV on a Friday afternoon, even the sweetest of grandmas.
Let’s have a look at your paperwork,” I said as I glanced at the neatly stacked forms. Mr. Crocker.”
I pulled the clip off the stack and examined the documents. He had all his required papers: the license renewal form and his personal property tax receipt, but his proof of insurance was expired. I glanced up with great reluctance. Mr. Crocker had to have been in the reception area at least thirty minutes and he had the look of a man tired of waiting. He gripped his keys in his hand, like he could squeeze a glass of juice right out of them. His eyes jumped around the room as he studied all the DMV employees behind the counter, landing on one person and moving onto the next.
Just as I was about to explain the situation, I felt the all-too-familiar tingle of a vision coming on.
Oh, crappy doodles.
Like a photograph in my mind, I saw me. Deader than a doornail.
I stared at Mr. Crocker and gasped, my eyes so big I felt them drying out. My jaw dropped so far I was amazed it didn’t hit the counter. Just as the words You’re going to kill me” began tumbling out, a black fuzziness flooded my brain.
The next thing I knew, a buzz swept through the DMV and it wasn’t from a swarm of bees. The DMV staff and customers had crowded around me.
I opened my eyes. My forehead throbbed where it must have smacked the Formica.
Rose Gardner, what in heaven’s name happened to you?” The voice of Betty, my boss, boomed in my ear. I knew I must have fainted because one minute I sat gawking at the man who was planning to murder me and the next I was practically making out with my workspace. Not that I ever made out. I was a good girl, after alltwenty-four years old and I’d never even been kissed.
Sitting up, I raised my hand to my head and lightly probed the growing knot with my fingertips. I don’t know ” I mumbled, squinting from the light. Fear slithered in my gut as I peered over the counter to see if Mr. Crocker was still there. He stood to the side, pushed out of the way by a couple of elderly women eager for what had to be the best gossip in Henryetta all week. He eyed me warily, and my heart raced as I wondered how much I said before I passed out.
Now, I’d had a multitude of visions all my life. I was gifted, or curseddepending on who you askedwith the sight. My grandma on my father’s side had it. People respected her and considered her the Oracle of Lafayette County, Arkansas.
But me? I was just a freak.
Most of the time I paid it no mind. I kept to myself and everyone in my town of Henryetta liked it that way. While my grandma saw helpful information such as droughts and locust infestations, I was cursed with seeing useless and mundane things like Mrs. White’s toilet overflow or the ear infection in Jenny Baxter’s baby. None of that would be so bad if I kept what I saw to myself, but my visions didn't work that way. Without any volition of my own, whatever I saw just blurted right out of my mouth. Most of the people who knew me thought I was a snoop or a gossip, the only rational explanation to reason away my knowledge. But Momma had another opinion. She declared me demon-possessed.
But in my twenty-four years, I’d never had a vision about me, so seeing myself dead was quite the shock. I scrunched my eyes, trying to remember what I’d seen. I was leaning back on Momma’s sofa. Blood spread out behind my head, blending with the pink cabbage roses and seeping into the ivory background. My open eyes had a dull, glazed stare. All I could think was how angry Momma was going to be about all that blood on her favorite sofa. I didn’t think there was enough hydrogen peroxide in the entire state of Arkansas to get out that stain.
Rose!”
My eyes flew open. A crowd of people had gathered around, watching to see if I’d pass out again. After I considered Momma’s impending outrage, it was a definite possibility.
I’m I’m sorry. I don’t know what happened.” I said between gasps of air. My eyes glanced to Mr. Crocker, who crept backward with a look of annoyance.
I’ll tell you what happened,” said Suzanne, who worked at the counter next to mine. She was processing that license renewal and the next thing I know she mumbled You’re’ and then her head fell forward and whacked the counter.” Suzanne’s favorite obsession was herself so it amazed me that she had caught that much. But then again, she didn’t much like me so my guess was that she welcomed the opportunity to gather more ammunition. She leaned back in her chair, arms crossed in front of the cleavage bursting out of her low-cut blouse. She tilted her head and her mouth lifted into a mocking half-smile.
I just felt a little dizzy, that’s all. I’ll be fine.” I tucked a stray strand of hair behind my ear with a shaky hand.
Oh, no. No way. You might think you’ll be fine, but you just fainted. You sit there for a minute and then you’re goin’ home.” Betty’s voice was as large as her oversized body. Every person in the room heard her proclamation.
Seriously?” Suzanne asked, sounding like a toddler on the verge of a fit. I asked you four times already if I could leave early to get a head start on my weekend and you said no. All Freaky Rose has to do is beat her head on her desk and she gets to go? That hardly seems fair.”
Betty put her hand on her hip and narrowed her eyes. Suzanne,” she drew her name out slowly as if she were talking to a small child. Rose never calls in sick and hardly ever takes a day off. You, on the other hand, call in all the time and have used all your vacation days. But next time you wanna leave early, I’ll let you go. As long as you beat your head on your desk first.”
Yeah, well, the only reason she never takes time off is because she doesn’t have a life.” Suzanne eyed me as if I were a cockroach about to scurry across the floor.
Betty scowled then surveyed the room, taking in the gawkers lined up against the counter. All right, show’s over, folks. Y’all get back in your seat unless your number’s been called.”
The crowd broke up, people grumbling and whispering. No sane person balked at Betty’s orders, not even the fuming Suzanne. Her eyes shot flaming arrows of hate toward me as she fluffed her bleached blonde hair.
Suzanne leaned toward me and hissed. Don’t think I’m not on to you, Miss Goody-Two-Shoes.”
I turned toward her in surprise. I had no idea what she meant. But then again, I suspected she didn’t either. My clammy palm rested on Mr. Crocker’s paperwork, reminding me I hadn’t finished processing it. But as my head swiveled around and searched the room, I saw he was gone.
I couldn’t understand that. Why would he just abandon his personal papers?
I sat at my desk trying to slow my galloping heart and glanced down at the paperwork. His first name was Daniel and he lived on Highway 82. I tried to memorize the address, knowing that if I wrote it down, Suzanne would catch me and make a big deal about it. I told myself I was crazy, or paranoid. Or both. My demon possession had branched out into new areas.
I grabbed my purse and headed out. I pushed open the heavy metal door, searching for Mr. Crocker before I entered the humid parking lot. Nothing. I shook my head at my over-active imagination. Seriously, Rose. My visions didn’t always come true and this one seemed too preposterous to consider. The logical explanation to his leaving was that I freaked him out. Just like I freaked out everyone else in Henryetta.
--This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.
From the Back Cover
"Readers will root for the appealing heroine."
--"Publishers Weekly"
"Light, fluffy, southern fun."
--"Booklist"
"TWENTY-EIGHT AND A HALF WISHES is a nice mix of darker elements with some lightheartedness as balance...the light tone and smooth prose keep the story moving."
--"Noir Journal"
"This was one of those books that I kept telling myself one more page, then I need to put it down. Instead I found myself tearing through the book instead, needing to know the outcome."
--"Just Jump Book Reviews" on "Twenty-Eight and a Half Wishes"
"Readers will enjoy this lighthearted romantic suspense novel with a dash of comedy. The characters are memorable, the pace is fast and the dialogue is witty."
--"RT Book Reviews" on "Twenty-Nine and a Half Reasons" --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.
Product details
- ASIN : B0058UXHHK
- Publisher : DGS (December 19, 2013)
- Publication date : December 19, 2013
- Language : English
- File size : 1829 KB
- Text-to-Speech : Enabled
- Screen Reader : Supported
- Enhanced typesetting : Enabled
- X-Ray : Enabled
- Word Wise : Enabled
- Sticky notes : On Kindle Scribe
- Print length : 336 pages
- Best Sellers Rank: #2,037 Free in Kindle Store (See Top 100 in Kindle Store)
- #14 in Mystery Romance
- #136 in Women Sleuths (Kindle Store)
- #159 in Romantic Suspense (Kindle Store)
- Customer Reviews:
About the author

New York Times, Wall Street Journal, and USA Today bestselling author Denise Grover Swank was born in Kansas City, Missouri and lived in the area until she was nineteen. Then she became nomadic, living in five cities, four states and ten houses over the course of ten years before she moved back to her roots. She speaks English and smattering of Spanish and Chinese which she learned through an intensive Nick Jr. immersion period. Her hobbies include witty Facebook comments (in own her mind) and dancing in her kitchen with her children. (Quite badly if you believe her offspring.) Hidden talents include the gift of justification and the ability to drink massive amounts of caffeine and still fall asleep within two minutes. Her lack of the sense of smell allows her to perform many unspeakable tasks. She has six children and hasn’t lost her sanity. Or so she leads you to believe.
You can find out more about Denise at www.denisegroverswank.com
Customer reviews
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Reviewed in the United States on February 26, 2018
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Top reviews
Top reviews from the United States
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The first few pages didn't do much to dispel my fears. Rose is the definition of meek. She's nice, polite, and her most offensive expletive is "crappy doodles." She's 24 years old and, when she's not working at her mindless job at the DMV, she's at the beck and call of her religious mother (who is downright abusive and tells Rose she's possessed by the devil because she gets "visions"). While Rose doesn't like her situation, she seemed apathetic to changing it.
If the story continued that way for too long, I wouldn't be saying this: I really liked Twenty-Eight and a Half Wishes. Despite the uncertainty in the first few pages, Grover Swank didn't waste any time allowing Rose to bloom (pun fun).
While at work, Rose gets a vision of herself lying dead on her sofa and faints. Faced with (potentially) her death, she realizes she's never really lived. She stands up to her demanding mother and storms out of the house to cool off. Before she returns, she takes out a Wal*Mart receipt and begins to make a list of things she wants to do before she dies. Commit all the deadly sins in one week, fly in a plane, dance in the rain, visit Italy, drink a beer (is it shocking that the item that made me wince was that she'd never drank a beer?).
When she returns home, she realizes she'll have more time than she thought to check off items on the list. Her vision sort ofcame true, except instead of Rose being on the couch it was her mother.
Unfortunately, gossip spreads fast and the fact that Rose had fought with her mother right before her mother was murdered hasn't gone unnoticed - especially not by the old busybody across the street and the small-town police officers. Not only is Rose a suspect, but it becomes clear the murderer is still after her.
Rose must do her best to keep out of jail and stay alive. After all, she has a list to finish.
Obviously, there's the standard "Woman gets accused of murder. Real killer pursues woman. Police are corrupt/unmotivated. Woman must solve crime to save her life" crime element that is present in so many novels in this genre, but in this circumstance it seemed to serve mostly as a vehicle for Rose's development. And that was a good thing, because Rose really grew on me (I swear that pun was accidental).
Her home life may have kept her naïve and down trodden, but Rose wasn't stupid. Socially awkward? Yes. But that just made her more endearing. It made you want to cheer for Rose - not just to solve the mystery but to experience life. When she got a makeover and purchased some new clothes, I was excited for her. Rose felt like a truly good person and she deserved to feel good about herself!
So much of my enjoyment of this book came from Rose checking things off her list. For example, her sitting on the porch with Joe and discovering beer for the first time (and, the next morning, discovering that beer wasn't her new best friend). Oh, and buying the scandalous nighty at Wal*Mart (which didn't sound all that scandalous)...too funny.
Of course, you can't review one of these books without mentioning the "love interest." Even though I've been loving the hell out of these books (they're a fun way to wrap up my "100 books a year" reading challenge), I'm not a big romance person. I know, I'm probably the only one who reads these kinds of books and feels that way, but I can usually tolerate it as long as it doesn't take over the plot.
I'm happy to say that, in this book, the romance was actually pretty tolerable. Probably because there wasn't a ton of it and, you know, with Rose so innocent and inexperienced, it wasn't going to go all 50 Shades of Grey. Joe was plenty mysterious, but, for the most part, I couldn't help feeling like he was a good guy. It was clear he wanted to keep Rose from getting hurt, but he never tried to make her decisions for her. In fact, he may have been one of the few people in her life that wasn't.
The ending itself wasn't all that shocking, but I barely noticed because of how it ended. Just when I thought Rose and her antics couldn't get any better, they did. I was laughing at one sentence and cheering at the next.
This maybe one of the best (if not top) feel good books I've read. I liked that.
Top reviews from other countries

I didn’t expect to enjoy it as much as I did. It was a freebie when I downloaded it (though it’s not anymore), and while I have absolutely LOVED many freebies, I never go into them expecting too much. The synopsis did sound really fun though…
I loved pretty much everything about this book, I’ll be honest. The one (or maybe two?) things I didn’t enjoy so much was that Rose has been raised with such a religious and conservative mother who thinks everything modern is “the gateway to hell”. She’s 24 years old, and she’s under the thumb big time. The second thing, and it’s sort of tied in with the first, is that her mother was so abusive to her when she was growing up. There aren’t any scenes of this nature but there are passing descriptions of it and Rose has clearly been damaged by it. That was really sad, and it seemed to be a theme that kept cropping up.
The rest of the book though, I did enjoy. I liked seeing Rose blossom into her own person, though it took her a while to come out of her shell (I suppose that comes from being repressed her whole life). This book is the first in a series, but it can be read as a stand-alone if you prefer. There wasn’t much detective work from Rose herself (it’s labelled “a Rose Gardner Mystery”), but she’s definitely along for the ride as the truth unfolds, and it’s an interesting outcome, and I would think her detective work comes out more and more with each book in the series anyway. I definitely enjoyed it
TRIGGER WARNINGS ⚠️ child abuse, social rejection

Although the author seems to lose her way a couple of times, I thoroughly enjoyed the read and found it to be one of those books that I looked forward to getting back to. We’ve got Rose Gardner, who’s a bit of a divvy and who has psychic visions of no real importance (until now), and Joe McAllister, who’s a man of the world. Is he a villain? Is he to be trusted? Is he all he makes himself out to be?
Rose is frustratingly stupid. She doesn’t tell Joe about her second break in, which as far as being short-sighted is concerned, is about as daft as she can get. If he was the one who broke in, then he’ll know about it anyway. And if he wasn’t, then he’ll be able to put measures in place to protect her. She doesn’t even tell the police!
Where I lost the story slightly was when Rose has to hand over a flash drive to Daniel Crocker, the villain of the piece, who repulses her. For some unknown reason she finds the need to hang about and snog him, just because he fancies her. For no other reason than that! A more realistic storyline would see her drop the flash drive in his beer, say, “Stuff you,” and walk out of the bar. Instead she hangs around and plays up to him. I failed to understand why.
There’s a bit of a spoiler coming here: In the final scene we find Rose completely outfought, bullied and intimidated by an old lady, even though a little while earlier she’s had a good old tear-up with Crocker. She can stand up to him all right, but not a woman 40 years her senior. It doesn’t make sense.
But all in all it’s a good book, a light read and easy to jump in and out of. I’d recommend it.
Oh, and the twenty eight wishes; they’re a bit of a sub-plot, if you like. Just a bucket list that she dreams up in the beginning of the book after her mother’s murder. It’s worth a read.

Overall, I thought it wasn't worth the read and certainly wouldn't bother with other books written by the same author.

I didn't pay for this book so cannot be too disappointed.

It was certainly a mystery and I was easily drawn into it from the first few chapters. Who'd want to kill a (horrible) old woman? A well known member of the community? I was certainly stumped since I knew it couldn't be Rose, who probably had the motive but was too nice a person.
I really liked both Joe and Rose and was urging them to get together from early on especially when he was being so nice and helpful to her after her mums murder while everyone else treated her like crap. Not the nicest little town to live in.
It wasn't hard to figure something weird was going on with Joe with all his pained looks and disappearing acts and I was intrigued as to what it would be. I wasn't disappointed.
Looking forward to reading more of this series!