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  • Bird by Bird: Some Instructions on Writing and Life
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4.6 out of 5 stars
4.6 out of 5
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Bird by Bird: Some Instructions on Writing and Life

Bird by Bird: Some Instructions on Writing and Life

byAnne Lamott
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Top positive review

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Dario Dallalasta
5.0 out of 5 starsand a treasure trove of good advice. I learned to get started with short ...
Reviewed in the United States on April 18, 2018
Wry writing tips from a true master, filled with hilarious patter, poignant moments, and a treasure trove of good advice. I learned to get started with short assignments, write "shitty first drafts," and denounce perfectionism (one of my major hindrances). She writes, "Perfectionism is a mean, frozen form of idealism, while messes are the artist's true friend."

Ms. Lamott touches upon all kinds of subjects that writers find intriguing, such as writer's block (and writer's jealousy), the benefits of writing groups and conferences, the ups and downs of publishing, and finding your voice. I loved her writing voice - it was honest and clear-headed and self-deprecating and touching. There's one very short story she includes that literally brought stinging tears to my eyes. I still to this day find such a feat to be a miraculous gift from a writer. I also loved this little instruction on writing and life: "There's no point in writing hopeless novels. We all know we're going to die; what's important is the kind of men and women we are in the face of this." Wise words, Ms. Lamott.

As writers, we tend to be navel-gazers, but the following tidbit really hit home with the selfishness of some of my writing: "Some of us tend to think that what we do and say and decide and write are cosmically important things. But they're not." After which she states, "If you don't know which way to go, keep it simple." Such good advice!

Finally, she advises that writing can bring you great pleasure in the midst of undeniable pain. And maybe, just maybe, you can write something that actually makes a difference: "Against all odds, you have put it down on paper, so that it won't be lost. And who knows? Maybe what you've written will help others, will be a small part of the solution. You don't even have to know how or in what way, but if you are writing the clearest, truest words you can find and doing the best you can to understand and communicate, this will shine on paper like its own little lighthouse." I think it's safe to say that now I want to be her best friend.
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116 people found this helpful

Top critical review

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Tantra Bensko
2.0 out of 5 starsNot instructions I'd want to live or write by
Reviewed in the United States on November 9, 2018
Obviously a lot of people have gotten value from this book, and so there must be something useful to it that I'm not seeing. But I personally found it to be the opposite of what I was personally looking for in a book ostensibly about writing instruction. I kept waiting for the writing instruction to occur, something about hooks, plotting, structure, POV, voice, succinct prose, different expectations for each genre, or something, anything. I eventually realized the author had no intentions of providing any specific advice, so I relaxed into it being a book about living creatively with personality disorders. I feel sympathy for people who struggle. I know it's not their fault. I want to show them love.

And, I'd be interested to read about someone's unbalanced emotional state, sure, but not if it's projected onto me. I didn't identity with her descriptions about what I will feel as an author. It's not promoted as a book about her life as much as a book predicting what "you" will feel. It's prescriptive. It's targeted to the reader. It's saying this is what we will inevitably feel. And I think that is a dangerous practice. People tend to believe authority figures, and they experience what they believe they are expected to feel, via a kind of placebo effect. What our subconscious is told our subconscious can believe. What she details feeling is anything but pleasant or productive.

Also, since it's listed as being about how to write, untrained readers might actually believe this is all you have to do - write messy, write passionate, write diligent, and apparently don't ever plan out the plot according to some tried and true schemata, according to research about what readers enjoy. Even experimental writers need to learn the rules in order to break them meaningfully. I've talked to readers of this book who said it threw them off for a long wasted time of writing because they gleaned from it that all you had to do was write random words without consideration for putting the correct plot points in the proper location in the Act structure.

As well as being a manuscript editor, I've taught writing with universities for fourteen years. My fiction writing students are happy with my classes, and they make great improvement. I don't feel that's a bad thing. But this author boasts about how unhappy she makes her students by insisting to them that they will experience what she did, and she makes fun of them for not commenting and instead asking about getting an agent. That was somewhat a little funny if I looked at it from her POV, but it was the only moment I saw as remotely humorous. I read it as a desperately sad book overall.

There is some cautionary advice not to let the ego get too involved, to strengthen the self esteem rather than depending on book feedback to provide it. If she had provided some proven, specific psychological methods of doing that, and if she demonstrated that she had that balance, herself, and what that feels like, I believe it could have been more worthwhile.
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From the United States

Tantra Bensko
2.0 out of 5 stars Not instructions I'd want to live or write by
Reviewed in the United States on November 9, 2018
Verified Purchase
Obviously a lot of people have gotten value from this book, and so there must be something useful to it that I'm not seeing. But I personally found it to be the opposite of what I was personally looking for in a book ostensibly about writing instruction. I kept waiting for the writing instruction to occur, something about hooks, plotting, structure, POV, voice, succinct prose, different expectations for each genre, or something, anything. I eventually realized the author had no intentions of providing any specific advice, so I relaxed into it being a book about living creatively with personality disorders. I feel sympathy for people who struggle. I know it's not their fault. I want to show them love.

And, I'd be interested to read about someone's unbalanced emotional state, sure, but not if it's projected onto me. I didn't identity with her descriptions about what I will feel as an author. It's not promoted as a book about her life as much as a book predicting what "you" will feel. It's prescriptive. It's targeted to the reader. It's saying this is what we will inevitably feel. And I think that is a dangerous practice. People tend to believe authority figures, and they experience what they believe they are expected to feel, via a kind of placebo effect. What our subconscious is told our subconscious can believe. What she details feeling is anything but pleasant or productive.

Also, since it's listed as being about how to write, untrained readers might actually believe this is all you have to do - write messy, write passionate, write diligent, and apparently don't ever plan out the plot according to some tried and true schemata, according to research about what readers enjoy. Even experimental writers need to learn the rules in order to break them meaningfully. I've talked to readers of this book who said it threw them off for a long wasted time of writing because they gleaned from it that all you had to do was write random words without consideration for putting the correct plot points in the proper location in the Act structure.

As well as being a manuscript editor, I've taught writing with universities for fourteen years. My fiction writing students are happy with my classes, and they make great improvement. I don't feel that's a bad thing. But this author boasts about how unhappy she makes her students by insisting to them that they will experience what she did, and she makes fun of them for not commenting and instead asking about getting an agent. That was somewhat a little funny if I looked at it from her POV, but it was the only moment I saw as remotely humorous. I read it as a desperately sad book overall.

There is some cautionary advice not to let the ego get too involved, to strengthen the self esteem rather than depending on book feedback to provide it. If she had provided some proven, specific psychological methods of doing that, and if she demonstrated that she had that balance, herself, and what that feels like, I believe it could have been more worthwhile.
480 people found this helpful
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CBx
2.0 out of 5 stars Of a time and place, but still occasionally inspiring
Reviewed in the United States on February 1, 2020
Verified Purchase
2.5 stars. I had heard for a while that this was an excellent book of writing advice, so I got it, and then it sat on my shelf for years. Each time I thought about which book to read next, I passed this one by, because who wants to read dry writing advice when there are actual stories available? Finally, I decided to read it, and found that it contained stories itself. In all that time, I had somehow missed that the book's subtitle states it will provide "some instructions on writing and life".

The writing advice provided here is of the inspirational type. The author tells you how to approach assignments, how to begin daunting tasks, and the role of practice and dedication in improving your writing. She also tells you about the negative emotions and self-doubt you may encounter, and the importance of avoiding perfectionism. Writing is placed in a larger context, framed as a pursuit of truth, and a way of being, observing, and creating in the world. There is some more concrete advice here too, about developing characters, learning to observe and remember, and the realities of publishing, but you will not find the nuts and bolts of crafting narratives in this book.

The life advice is less generally applicable. The author tells stories from her life in each chapter on an aspect of writing. The stories include questions her students have asked in class, conversations with her friends, and experiences with her son. Many of the stories provide pithy quotes that illustrate her writing advice. On both writing and life, the author's voice comes through clearly, by turns chatty, self-deprecating, and reverent. It is very much of a time and place, and a number of reviewers have found her tone smug, thoughtless, or even discriminatory. I was put off by some of it too, but the author does state that her humor is dark, and I believe that some of what comes across as tone-deaf today would not have when this was first published. So know that before reading this - the author's tone and references to things that you may not like aside, you could still read this and find yourself inspired.
16 people found this helpful
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Tanya Ferrera
2.0 out of 5 stars This author believes you are neurotic and small-minded
Reviewed in the United States on September 29, 2021
Verified Purchase
This book is written in the disconcerting second person. It becomes very tiresome to hear that I am "really stuck and filled with despair and self-loathing and boredom." and that I should ditch my friends who have feedback on my work by saying "Well. I'm sorry, but I can't be friends with you anymore, because you have too many problems. And you have a bad personality. And a bad character." or "You may begin showing signs of schizophrenia..."

Granted these observations are probably intended to be funny, but after a while "you" start to feel this author believes that to be a good writer you must have a terrible opinion of yourself, question everything you do and write, and get rid of friends who are more successful than you (among other quite nasty things). I imagine this is the part of the title where she gives us "some suggestions on life." I found these observations quite tiresome, especially since they are sprinkled copiously throughout the book. She does do a great job of squeezing the joy out of the writing process. I don't need a cheerleader, but I just as much don't need to be told to see my therapist.

I got 3/4 of the way through and wasn't able to finish. The only reason I made it that far is because this is a well-known book and often recommended by writers I admire. I just kept hoping for some kernels of truth or wisdom. Two stars because I found a few helpful tips in the first section which actually addresses the writing process. The book quickly devolves after that. Perhaps the author edited the first section in between editions but became too depressed and bored reading her own writing to make it through to the end.
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Emre Sermutlu
2.0 out of 5 stars Therapy, yes, writing advice, no.
Reviewed in the United States on December 19, 2020
Verified Purchase
She seems to be a great person. I sure would like to have a conversation with her over coffee. But unfortunately, this book is not what I was looking for. There's no writing advice. I wanted to learn about advantages and disadvantages of first and third person narratives, how and how much to use flashbacks, how to describe a character, what makes a great villain, do readers really like plot twists... I would love if someone explained how these techniques are used, with good and bad examples from literature.

What I found instead was, Anne Lamott's mostly sad but sometimes funny and always inspiring life, struggles and feelings.

She says that one of editors told her "You have made the mistake of thinking that everything that has happened to you is interesting". I couldn't agree more.
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NarJuzz
2.0 out of 5 stars I bought this new and it looks completely used!!
Reviewed in the United States on May 17, 2022
Verified Purchase
I don’t ever write reviews but this really caught my attention. I bought this book for a college courses the book wasn’t bought “used”, unless I misunderstood, I bought this new! There are scratches in the front, the book is bent in the front and back cover, and inside there seems to be a huge mark with a red substance. Even though the product came in this state, the delivery was fast.
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NarJuzz
2.0 out of 5 stars I bought this new and it looks completely used!!
Reviewed in the United States on May 17, 2022
I don’t ever write reviews but this really caught my attention. I bought this book for a college courses the book wasn’t bought “used”, unless I misunderstood, I bought this new! There are scratches in the front, the book is bent in the front and back cover, and inside there seems to be a huge mark with a red substance. Even though the product came in this state, the delivery was fast.
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Margaret Daisley
2.0 out of 5 stars The first chapter was great - everything the title promises
Reviewed in the United States on April 6, 2018
Verified Purchase
The first chapter was great - everything the title promises, full of advice and metaphor. After that it gradually bogs down and becomes less interesting, as if the author has compiled notes from her writing class without much revision. But perhaps that's the nature of writing -- just keep plugging away at it, bird by bird.
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PAMom
2.0 out of 5 stars Damaged
Reviewed in the United States on July 28, 2021
Verified Purchase
There are slices through the cover that go through the first ten pages (like a box cutter). ??? I bought this as a new book, not used.
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PAMom
2.0 out of 5 stars Damaged
Reviewed in the United States on July 28, 2021
There are slices through the cover that go through the first ten pages (like a box cutter). ??? I bought this as a new book, not used.
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Joan Freesh
2.0 out of 5 stars Boring
Reviewed in the United States on June 1, 2020
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Could not read much. Boring and self serving
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Nornu
2.0 out of 5 stars Book
Reviewed in the United States on September 2, 2020
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Good
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B. Freeman
2.0 out of 5 stars A better title would be “But I Digress...”
Reviewed in the United States on November 5, 2020
Verified Purchase
Lots of words! Many asides! Passages and passages of asides! Clearly, many have enjoyed and valued this book. If you like her style, and love her shtick, you’re in for a treat. I’d (highly) recommend Stephen King’s (far superior) “On Writing” if you are looking for sound advice supported by interesting, well written stories about the writer’s life and the experiences that shaped him.
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