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4.7 out of 5 stars
4.7 out of 5
17,346 global ratings
5 star
83%
4 star
12%
3 star
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2 star
1%
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The Whole-Brain Child: 12 Revolutionary Strategies to Nurture Your Child's Developing Mind

The Whole-Brain Child: 12 Revolutionary Strategies to Nurture Your Child's Developing Mind

byDaniel J. Siegel
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Top positive review

All positive reviews›
Ed B.
5.0 out of 5 starsIf you get only one book ever on child development, let it be this one.
Reviewed in the United States 🇺🇸 on March 29, 2023
Having read about half a dozen or so books specifically on childhood development and another dozen or so on stoicism and other mental health practices, I've concluded that this is THE authoritative book that every parent should read at least once. First off, the way it is written is very casual and familiar, which makes it very accessible to anyone who is even remotely literate. Second, the concepts featured are easy to understand and explained in a a very succinct way. Third, it isn't a laundry list of techniques; its a topical analysis of the most effective methods on how to connect with your children emotionally and logically. And fourth (a big one for me), this isn't a "how you're screwed up mentally, so fix yourself first" book. Any parent can read this book and pick up the techniques and apply them immediately. There's no "blame yourself first, then address the issue" cathartic flagellation message here.

As I worked my way through the book, I tried the techniques on my 2.5 year old and it was pretty much miraculous. I already had a good relationship with her, but connecting on a different level was rewarding as a parent. It helped me help her work through tantrums, difficult or scary situations, and find ways to effectively problem solve on her own. This book doesn't just empower us parents, it empowers our children too, which should be the end goal of every parent.

The book is a quick read (I finished it in about a week working full time and with 4 kids in the household), so its very accessible. The content is immediately useful and non-judgemental. As my review title suggests, if there were only one book us parents could read about child development and the role we as parents play in that development, it needs to be this book.
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38 people found this helpful

Top critical review

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Pestle
1.0 out of 5 starsThis is Snake Oil
Reviewed in the United States 🇺🇸 on July 2, 2018
This book is part of the "Brain Balance" predatory pop neuroscience being marketed to overwhelmed parents of challenging children. It was recommended by a child behavioral psychologist who told me she recommends it to all parents, and I'm disappointed that she thinks this book could ever be helpful. I hoped that, after the introduction, there would be practical advice that worked, even if the fake science used to describe it was bunk. Unfortunately not the case. If you wade through the (uncited) fake science, the unprofessional, awkward cartoon illustrations, and the little vignettes of parenting challenges (which are described but unsresolved), you get . . . nothing. This is a slick package without a product inside.
I'm also a desperate parent, looking for a lifeline. There's no lifeline here; just lies: page after page of line drawings showing hands and houses to illustrate the crock ideas of "upstairs and downstairs brains" and "left brains and right brains." It's fine to discuss and classify human behaviors and interests using the left/right concept as a metaphor, but don't sell us a miracle cure for a problem that isn't real. Brain "de-integration" is not the cause of challenging childhood behaviors, and while it's nice to think that we could buy a book that fixes our children's brains, it's not that easy.

You want the entirety of the book's advice?

-When your kid is on the verge of a tantrum, don't try to shut them down with a rational explanation of why they shouldn't be throwing a tantrum. Let them have their feelings, and work from there

That's it. The entire book. More helpful books that start with that tidbit and give evidence-based advice are Ross Greene's "The Explosive Child," Jim and Charles Fay's "Love and Logic Magic for Early Childhood," and Alan E. Kazdin's "The Kazdin Method for Parenting the Defiant Child." None of which have worked a miracle in my child's behavior, but they have each, in their own way, helped me to adjust my parenting and lower my stress level as we progress through our new normal. "The Whole-Brain Child" is marketed to the same audience, but has nothing to offer.
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2,675 people found this helpful

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From the United States

Ed B.
5.0 out of 5 stars If you get only one book ever on child development, let it be this one.
Reviewed in the United States 🇺🇸 on March 29, 2023
Verified Purchase
Having read about half a dozen or so books specifically on childhood development and another dozen or so on stoicism and other mental health practices, I've concluded that this is THE authoritative book that every parent should read at least once. First off, the way it is written is very casual and familiar, which makes it very accessible to anyone who is even remotely literate. Second, the concepts featured are easy to understand and explained in a a very succinct way. Third, it isn't a laundry list of techniques; its a topical analysis of the most effective methods on how to connect with your children emotionally and logically. And fourth (a big one for me), this isn't a "how you're screwed up mentally, so fix yourself first" book. Any parent can read this book and pick up the techniques and apply them immediately. There's no "blame yourself first, then address the issue" cathartic flagellation message here.

As I worked my way through the book, I tried the techniques on my 2.5 year old and it was pretty much miraculous. I already had a good relationship with her, but connecting on a different level was rewarding as a parent. It helped me help her work through tantrums, difficult or scary situations, and find ways to effectively problem solve on her own. This book doesn't just empower us parents, it empowers our children too, which should be the end goal of every parent.

The book is a quick read (I finished it in about a week working full time and with 4 kids in the household), so its very accessible. The content is immediately useful and non-judgemental. As my review title suggests, if there were only one book us parents could read about child development and the role we as parents play in that development, it needs to be this book.
38 people found this helpful
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Amazon Customer
5.0 out of 5 stars Fantastic Book
Reviewed in the United States 🇺🇸 on May 12, 2023
Verified Purchase
Fantastic book to help understand little minds (and actually, our own as well) better, and how to engage/act/react, and just have reminders and tools to learn and pay attention and work at certain things in a better, or different, way. A wonderful book to help embrace it all
4 people found this helpful
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Kimberlee R McDowell
5.0 out of 5 stars Brain science explained easily for parents
Reviewed in the United States 🇺🇸 on May 3, 2023
Verified Purchase
Actual brain scientists, who are also parents, wrote this book. They wrote it to where anyone can understand and relate. If you want to understand more about your child and learn ways to help nurture them to be emotionally intelligent, read this book!
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Kimberlee R McDowell
5.0 out of 5 stars Brain science explained easily for parents
Reviewed in the United States 🇺🇸 on May 3, 2023
Actual brain scientists, who are also parents, wrote this book. They wrote it to where anyone can understand and relate. If you want to understand more about your child and learn ways to help nurture them to be emotionally intelligent, read this book!
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2 people found this helpful
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Robert Morris
VINE VOICE
5.0 out of 5 stars How and why "the moments you are just trying to survive are actually opportunities to help your child to thrive"
Reviewed in the United States 🇺🇸 on October 9, 2012
Verified Purchase
As a father of three sons and a daughter and one of the grandfathers of their ten children, I can certainly understand what Daniel Siegel and Tina Payne Bryson have in mind while discussing moments of extreme stress for parents when their children become infuriating and intolerable. That is why I was intrigued by their explanation of the power of the "whole-brain approach" during all manner of touchpoints in parent-child relationships. That power is especially helpful in "the moments you are just trying to survive" because it creates "opportunities to help your child to thrive." In fact, the 12 strategies that Siegal and Bryson recommend can be effective for almost [begin italics] anyone [end italics] who has direct and frequent contact with children, including teachers, coaches, and clergy as well as parents and other relatives.

In fact, with only minor modification, I think they can be beneficial to interactive relationships between and among adults, especially to those within a workplace.

"What's great about this survive-and-thrive approach is that you don't have to try to carve out special time to help your children thrive. You can use [begin italics] all [end italics] of the interactions you share - the stressful, angry ones as well as the miraculous, adorable ones - as opportunities to help them become the responsible, caring, capable people you want them to be. That's what this book is about: using those everyday moments with your kids to help them reach their true potential."

These are among the passages that caught my eye:

o Integration of Various Mental Domains (Pages 6-10)
o Get in the Flow: Navigating the Waters Between Chaos and Rigidity (10-13)
o Left Brain, Right Brain: An Introduction (15-16)
o Two Halves Make a Whole: Combining the Left and the Right (18-22)
o The Mental Staircase: Integrating the Upstairs and Downstairs Brain (38-41)
o Integrating Ourselves: Using Our Own Mental Staircase (64-65)
o Integrating Implicit and Explicit: Assembling the Puzzle Pieces of the Mind (76-86)
o Mindsight and the Wheel of Awareness (93-97)
o Integrating Ourselves: Looking at Our Own Wheel of Awareness (117-118)
o Laying the Groundwork for Connection: Creating Positive Mental Models (125-127)
o Cultivating a "Yes" State of Mind: Helping Kids Be Receptive to Relationships (129-133)
o Integrating Ourselves: Making Sense of Our Own Story (143-144)

Note: I urge you to check out another of Siegal's books, Mindsight: The New Science of Personal Transformation, in which Mindsight and the Wheel of Awareness are among the subjects discussed.

Readers will appreciate Siegal and Bryson's skillful use of "What You Can Do" sections throughout their narrative that serve several purposes, notably focusing on key points while suggesting specific initiatives to apply what has been learned from the given material. For example, "What You Can Do: Helping Your Child Work from Both Sides of the Brain" (Pages 22-33). Dozens of eminently appropriate illustrations were created by Tuesday Mourning.

However, no brief commentary such as mine could possibly do full justice to the scope and depth of what Siegal and Bryson cover, with eloquence as well as rigor. I have elected not to list the twelve (12) strategies because I think they are best revealed in context, within the narrative. I do presume to suggest that those who are about to read this book begin and then frequently review later the "Whole-Brain Ages and Stages" material (on Pages 154-168) because it creates a wide and deep context, a frame of reference, for the abundance of information, insights, and recommendations in the six preceding chapters and Conclusion, "Bringing It All Together. "

This book need not be read straight through (although I prefer that approach) but it should certainly be consulted frequently, hence the importance of "Whole-Brain Ages and Stages" and the Index as well as (I hope) passages of special importance that have been highlighted.

I also presume to suggest that Daniel Siegal and Tina Payne Bryson's brilliant book will be most valuable to whole-brain readers. In it, they provide what they characterize in the Introduction as "an antidote to parenting and academic approaches that overemphasize achievement and perfection at any cost." It is imperative that everyone involved directly (and even indirectly) with the development if children "understand some basics about the young brain that [they] are helping to grow and develop."
68 people found this helpful
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Amazon Customer
5.0 out of 5 stars Not a big “reader”?? YOU CAN READ THIS!
Reviewed in the United States 🇺🇸 on March 4, 2023
Verified Purchase
Let me start off by saying I’m not a huge “reader”. I don’t have the greatest attention span and I’ve never been one to grab a book for fun. I finished this book in 3 days. The desire to be a better parent for my baby was definitely a good push, but i genuinely enjoyed reading this. My husband commented on how fast I was moving through it. It made me laugh a couple of times and the authors made the material extremely easy to digest.

I LOVE that this is backed by science. I love that in the times where i am exercising these skills in front of others, if I ever get a question i am able to share facts that I’ve learned from this book.

I recommend this for all parents, care-takers, and teachers!!
32 people found this helpful
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Kristin
5.0 out of 5 stars Must Read!
Reviewed in the United States 🇺🇸 on April 5, 2023
Verified Purchase
Every parent should read it!
Extremely insightful and well written guidance on how to help my kids better integrate (and good words for me too!).
5 people found this helpful
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Taylor
4.0 out of 5 stars One of my favorite books of all time
Reviewed in the United States 🇺🇸 on March 27, 2023
Verified Purchase
One of my favorite books of all time. Just a well-written, helpful book.
2 people found this helpful
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Vicky
5.0 out of 5 stars A must read for anyone who interacts with kids
Reviewed in the United States 🇺🇸 on March 24, 2023
Verified Purchase
This book is written in an easy to read way while also explaining neurobiology and ways to help nurture children. Whether you are a teacher, therapist, parent or caretaker, I think this book is vital.
7 people found this helpful
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Sarah
4.0 out of 5 stars 1 star reviews are getting something wrong
Reviewed in the United States 🇺🇸 on January 12, 2023
Verified Purchase
Very obnoxious to read 1 star reviews saying right brain/left brain science debunked. The concept that there are “right brain” and “left brain” people is what had debunked. It is not debunked neuroscience to say some functions happen on one side of the brain or the other. This is an entry level book for parents who want to understand brain development better than “my kid is intentionally trying to stress me” which is the mainstream cultural narrative. It isn’t and doesn’t claim to be a neuroscience textbook. I’m someone who looks at neuroscience and child development research for fun. I understand the desire for a deeper more complex understanding. But this isn’t a research article. It’s a great book for new parents.
54 people found this helpful
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MJ14
4.0 out of 5 stars Intimidating science, translated beautifully for the common reader, and applied astutely to parent-child interactions.
Reviewed in the United States 🇺🇸 on November 21, 2013
Verified Purchase
This is a very well conceived and executed book, and very worth your time. The authors do a tremendous job of translating neurobiology and cognitive psychology into basic language for a general audience, for use in direct child interactions. Through each of their 12 strategies for understanding and interacting with "The Whole-Brained Child," the authors begin by describing in an unintimidating manner the portion of the brain and its function that will be subsequently discussed from a behavioral standpoint. From here, they use that behavioral basis and give very detailed examples of how to handle child behavior stemming from the associated biology, referring back to the brain as a reference point rather than as the focus.

The point of the book, all science aside, is in dealing with certain child developmental features and behaviors (such as implicit memory, tantrums, fear of failure) by connecting with children directly. The science is used to serve as a backdrop but is a fascinating addition to what otherwise would be a simple behavioral book. Instead of just saying HOW to interact with children, the authors show us WHY, which lends a much greater and more nuanced understanding to the how. This book provides a unique opportunity to read about everyday situations with children and relate them quickly and easily to a neurobiological level.

Though the authors say the book can be for direct childcare practitioners (such as teachers and daycare workers), the obvious target is parents. Here there are some issues. The book seems to be written for a white, suburban, middle class parent as opposed to the general population. Additionally, the practicality of some of the strategies is not immediately apparent, and the amount of effort required for many parents will be substantial - a paradigm shift for some ways. The illustrations are helpful in showing the dos and don'ts (not labelled as such, thankfully), but I found myself thinking the don'ts were many parent's default. The strategies really are a shift in thinking and require a lot of skill and investment to execute, but they are definitely achievable. In no way does this book alienate parents with over-expectations.

I also felt some situations I felt were not addressed adequately. Most of the examples of child behavior and parental involvement deal with more mundane, everyday occurrences from the 'average' child. If you are interested in how to explain to your child what death is, this book doesn't venture into those dangerous waters. Nor does it address more difficult children. Additionally, the section of bringing implicit memories to the explicit is somewhat suspect in its claims and its basis, which some may find hypocritical. If implicit memories are necessarily altered as the authors say, why would a parent with altered memories of an incident helping a child reconstruct the child's own altered memories of that same incident serve to help the child? I wonder too about parental inconsistency when using these strategies. Again, they are intensive and hard to do in the moment the behavior is being exhibited by the child. I do believe these are not major issues, however. The authors' stress on underlying the importance of connection, integration of thought, and mindset make most of the above manageable simply by establishing a trusting baseline relationship with the child.

Overall, I believe the pros of this book outweigh the negatives, though they should be noted. The authors' ability to successfully and fluently translate incredibly intricate science to the common reader (no college degree seems necessary for reading, but a level of literacy is assumed) is no small feat. It makes me wish more laboratory experiments that have real-world implications can be taken by researchers into the hands of the people that actually need and use them on a daily basis. Parents will find the strategies difficult to implement and will certainly encounter situations not touched upon here, but this is well worth the read. And it won't take you long...the writing style is easy to follow, the science unobtrusive and accessible, and the situations are often in dialogue-form and wonderfully vivid. Along with the illustrations and a very helpful appendix at the end denoting in which age ranges a parent should expect certain behaviors to manifest in, this book is a win.
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