Amazon.com: Customer reviews: The Soul of Discipline: The Simplicity Parenting Approach to Warm, Firm, and Calm Guidance- From Toddlers to Teens

Top positive review

Best parenting book I've read

Reviewed in the United States 🇺🇸 on May 12, 2016

I have read countless books on discipline and parenting, including Love and Logic; Adventures in Gentle Discipline; How to Talk so Kids Will Listen...; Siblings without Rivalry; Free-Range Parenting; Heaven on Earth; Punished by Rewards; It's ok not to Share; and Payne's own Simplicity Parenting. The Soul of Discipline surpasses all of these, and I only wish that it had been available 5 years ago when we began parenting! The developmental phases and "needs" presented make perfect sense. I have trialed just a few of the ideas that Payne shares and have already seen improvements in my relationship with my impetuous 5 year old. Some of the ideas are uncomfortable to read about, as I have been steeped in the parenting philosophy that says to be as inclusive as possible with your children. I read through the tween and teen sections, too, though, and am encouraged to see how that "ideal" of inclusiveness will become our reality as the children get older. I am so glad that I read this book, and highly recommend it to anyone who interacts with children. I only wish Payne had included more examples/scenarios, as I find those very helpful--but he did include enough to get us started.

60 people found this helpful

Top critical review

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JSCluff

Textbook parenting

Reviewed in the United States 🇺🇸 on February 10, 2018

This wasn’t a book filled with new ideas for me, as I felt it largely drew on basic material in the field of study. At times I felt like I was reading a textbook for one of my college classes. If you haven’t read that type of material I believe it would be fairly informative. It did have some good ideas it shared, but wasn’t anything especially new. This is a good basic parenting book to read.

One person found this helpful

161 total ratings, 42 with reviews

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From the United States

coastie08

Best parenting book I've read

Reviewed in the United States 🇺🇸 on May 12, 2016

Verified Purchase

60 people found this helpful

Helpful

Faith Rainbow Collins

An approach that grows with your kids

Reviewed in the United States 🇺🇸 on June 29, 2015

Verified Purchase

I love this book. It's a nice blend of big ideas and practical steps. I like that he offers three different "types" of discipline (where the adult acts as the Governor, the Gardener, or the Guide) that are appropriate for children at different ages, or in different situations. He talks about creating an expectation of "healthy compliance" not only so that we can enjoy our kids more, but also to help them develop that oh-so-important capacity of self-regulation, which research has shown to be an important indicator of later success in life. Another tidbit I found useful: the realization that children are better able to do what we ask, the physically closer we are to them. I know that and use it all the time, but had never thought of it in quite that way before. Lots of other gems, as well.

I would recommend this book highly (and already have!), and I'll keep it as a reference for my own parenting as my child continues to grow.

9 people found this helpful

Helpful

Carmen Harris

He's got your back, now you can enjoy some wonderful parenting/teaching with close and trusting relationships with your children

Reviewed in the United States 🇺🇸 on May 9, 2016

Verified Purchase

As an early childhood educator and parent I value the commonsence simplicity with which Kim John Payne has written this book. I feel he's got my back as I step more firmly and more assuredly on the path of my own inner clarity around school and family boundaries and help our little and bigger ones find themselves through creating safe and clear boundaries within which they can explore life in a nourishing way. The three step disciplinary process is an easy model to understand and allows for the growth and flexibility of the adult and growing child together, creating a trusting relationship that enables open communication. I am now recommending this book to all the parents of the children I teach as well as friends and colleagues. It should be on every teacher's and parent's bookshelf!

5 people found this helpful

Helpful

Flori

great book, great insights, and practical suggestions, not much repetition

Reviewed in the United States 🇺🇸 on September 10, 2020

Verified Purchase

although there is no one-size-fits-all solution when it comes to kids, this books covers a lot of scenarios. it has tons of good advice. other books are basically repeating the first chapter in other words in the rest of the book (you get the idea), but not this one.
Get it, no regrets!

One person found this helpful

Helpful

Richard Freed

A Remarkable, Heartwarming Book!

Reviewed in the United States 🇺🇸 on July 26, 2015

Verified Purchase

Kim John Payne takes the seemingly overwhelming task of providing children effective parenting and lays it out in a logical, clear fashion. You learn how to identify the approach your child or teen needs depending upon his or her stage of development. The “Avoiding Discipline Fads” chapter provides insight into the perils of using the latest “tricks” to raise kids, and instead the book helps parents provide their children the core experiences that help them become loving, successful adults. Payne also masterfully illuminates why we need to limit kids’ tech/screen time to foster their connection to family and improve their focus in school. As a child and adolescent psychologist, I will strongly recommend this book over and over to families.

9 people found this helpful

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Amazon Customer

Liked the position the book takes

Reviewed in the United States 🇺🇸 on July 1, 2017

Verified Purchase

Say it may be vague or without ground, but I see and identify with the middle ground taken by the author in parenting. I have read books that go the strict side and the loose side, and found that both had links missing in making sense of the parenting methods proposed in those books. This book bridged and explained the pros and cons these popular parenting methods possess and bring up one which draws in the good of both sides for reference.

5 people found this helpful

Helpful

JSCluff

Textbook parenting

Reviewed in the United States 🇺🇸 on February 10, 2018

Verified Purchase

One person found this helpful

Helpful

Zigzagmolly

Generalized Gender Characteristics Don't Help Anyone

Reviewed in the United States 🇺🇸 on March 11, 2017

Verified Purchase

Bought this book after a recommendation from my grandson's psychiatrist. Might be helpful for parents who always want to collaborate with their younger kids rather than just tell them what you want. So much of what was recommended didn't apply. BUT, then all of a sudden he categorized boys and girls behavior and motivations based specifically on the their gender. Separate sections on "HOW TO SPEAK TO TWEEN BOYS WHEN THINGS GET ROUGH" and the same for girls. First sentence: "Tween boys tend to be more practical than tween girls, and their emerging gender identity is more closely synchronized to their actions." Really!!! Generalized characteristics only fit SOME of those of that specific gender. Why not differentiate between personality characteristics rather then gender. I put the book down after that since my grandkids and I don't fit into those preconceived, generalized descriptions.

10 people found this helpful

Helpful

Paul

Good book

Reviewed in the United States 🇺🇸 on September 10, 2020

Verified Purchase

Good book. Recommended by emerson Waldorf. Passed the book on but was worth it

One person found this helpful

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Amazon Customer

For children of all ages

Reviewed in the United States 🇺🇸 on January 12, 2017

Verified Purchase

This book is wonderful in many ways. I highly reccomend it to parents with children of any age. My sister and I both got a copy and are implementing some changes in our households at the same time. She has 2 daughters, 6 and 8. I have a 20 month old son and the simplicity parenting techniques apply for all.

5 people found this helpful

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5 star		79%
4 star		12%
3 star		6%
2 star		3%
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The Soul of Discipline: The Simplicity Parenting Approach to Warm, Firm, and Calm Guidance- From Toddlers to Teens

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