Top critical review
Dangerously ignorant, Author doesn't indicate a full understanding of toxic behavior or gaslighting
Reviewed in the United States on October 15, 2020
When you have experienced long-term abuse and gaslighting, it can be psychologically damaging and invalidating to read a self-help book that is written by someone who doesn't understand the nuances of emotional abuse. I genuinely felt concerned for the number of people who are going to read this book without a foundational understanding of toxic relationships, gaslighting, and healthy boundaries. The author makes remarks indicating that she doesn't understand why some people react certain ways, and that she gets that some people can't let go of certain things so she kind of humors it. This is really misguided and irresponsible for someone who is trying to provide advice. Perhaps if she doesn't have a deep knowledge of the subject matter, she should not extend her advice to those audiences. Ignoring the nuances of abuse and the resulting CPTSD can in effect, re-invalidate the feelings of the person who was abused and cause them deeper issues. I do not recommend this book. I've spent twenty plus years reading various self-help books after experiencing emotional, physical, and sexual abuse in childhood. Many books have been helpful even if not quite addressing my specific issues (author Brene Brown), and some have been truly life changing like "Complex PTSD: From Surviving to Thriving" by Pete Walker.
This book, however, contained some advice that really should not be used in some circumstances, would lead to further abuse and self-invalidation, and honestly assists the abusers more than it does the abused. Please keep hunting for another book, unless perhaps the apology you need is a surface level one from an aquaintance.