Top critical review
3.0 out of 5 starsGreat start for a new author!
Reviewed in the United States 🇺🇸 on September 22, 2019
So this book was honestly pretty good, but there were some glaring issues.
First off the plot was pretty damn solid. The protagonist was a bit of a Mary Sue, but I can get over that. She's a girl with vast, nearly unlimited power who is limited by her experience. Okay. And the plot broken down to its core elements is essentially girl learning to trust while stuck in a town that is relatively safe from a secret war between wizards and Vampires... So the plot is kind of fun.
I did not realize this was a reverse harem books, shame on me for not reading closer. However I read through thisbook literally thinking she was making fun of twilight. Why have team Edward or team Jacob when you can have team (one of five guys).
Vinna, the protagonist is an interesting character. My only real problem with her is Introvert vs. extrovert. She is made out to be an introvert early, where she doesn't really want to be around others, and then like a light switch being pulled, she suddenly just wants to be with groups of people, that doesn't usually happen in real life, but minor gripe.
Editing is an issue. The grammar is pretty solid, I think I only saw one spelling mistake, so Ashley's editor is good in that regard. However there is a lot of fluff that distracts from the rest of the story... Basically, it feels like there are sections of the book that are just not necessary, but may have been left in there to make the book longer. And there are moments when the book gets to 'And then we were all cracking up,' about laughter. Needs a bit of varying descriptions.
Relationships. As suggested, this is a reverse-harem story. So as much as I mentioned other parts of the story were unnecessary, some of the 'harem' were not really developed as well as they could or should have been. (spoiler in parenthesis: I have red the second and part for the third novel, and I find it frustrating that new interests are added without finishing up the original ones... much is left dangling and incomplete.)
Over all, Ashley has proven to be a very good writer so far. Her prose is well written, her scenes are fantastic. But I think the editing needs a bit of work. But I have no doubt that we are seeing the early works of a potentially amazing author.
Ashley, if you read this, don't let me discourage you, just keep writing, and keep getting better.
